Carlow Phillips

Grandma’s iud depicts the Dalkon Shield, an intrauterine device in use from the late 60’s through the 80’s. It was the cause of a class action lawsuit, due to a design flaw in the device that caused pelvic infections, infertility, and even death. It was the type of IUD my grandmother Smokey used after the birth of my mother.

My grandmother carried my mother, and therefore the future of my siblings and I within her.

Hers and mine shows my hand, and my mother’s hand together. It is a literal representation of what is passed down in terms of physical traits. Recently, my mother told me that my hands are the same size and shape as Smokey’s. In this way, when my mother holds my hand, she is able to feel her mother’s presence again.

The Pee Frees were my mother’s imaginary childhood fairy friends. This plate from my childhood illustrated with butterflies, flowers, and little figures is a reference to how my childhood fostered a longing for magic and whimsy throughout my life

The pose for this self portrait is directly referenced from a family portrait of my grandmother Smokey when she was approximately my age. I am the first artist in my family despite both my mother and my grandmother’s interest in art, which neither of them took farther than a hobby. To represent this inheritance, I am holding a paintbrush and wearing a silk scarf of Smokeys. My role as an artist is tied both to my past, and to my future with the red tail hawk wings signaling my independence and freedom to pursue a career in the arts.

On Resilience No.1 is an illustrated representation of what resilience means to me: an ability to withstand and tolerate times of hardship and pain.

On Resilience no.2 is a representation of the most powerful facet of resilience: the ability not only to survive hardship and pain, but to come back from it time and time again.

This diptych shows my mother and I at similar ages, both with the first horses we ever rode: Round Trip and Molly. The juxtaposition of myself and my mother at these similar ages and stages in life plays on the fleeting nature of childhood; and imagines a connection out of time through our shared experiences with horseback riding.

Skinny Jeans is a commentary on how body image standards are perpetuated through familial storytelling. The illustration depicts a pair of jeans I bought that are just a size too small for me to wear comfortably, and the text comes from a note found in my grandmother’s closet after her death.

Smokey in Blue shows my grandmother Smokey in her early 20’s, close to my current age. This portrait is a glimpse into who she was at that age, and my attempt to connect with her memory without ever knowing her.

Strength of the Earth represents the grounded strength that comes from developing a close relationship to the natural world; something I learned to value through my mother.

Inspired by my experience with a hormonal IUD, Who Protects You? is a piece made to critique the passed-down perception that contraceptives and birth control should be a woman’s responsibility rather than a mans.

Heirloom Blues